Critics corner by Homer J. Simpson

Okay, we all know that I have fallen behind in my reviews for this paper. I’m sorry. When I left off I was just about to review Star Wars, so here goes…

I was late to the movie theater because my car at the time was an old rusty piece of junk. I still have it, but at least now it has some sweet dice hanging from the mirror.

so when i got to the theater, the only seat was between two fat guys. How come that always happens to us regular folks? I barely had any room to put my extra-large popcorn, foot-long hot dog, and supreme nachos.

But then the movie started and I was swept off of Earth to Tatooine, a distant planet that looks like New Mexico. For those who arent familiar with Star Wars, its a parody of Spaceballs.

Lots of story stuff happens, and I’m not sure who was what and which guy was who. I do know that theres this “Death Star” which Darth Vader is having a hard time trying to get built. Lousy contractors! I tried to make that joke to Darth, but he couldnt hear me.

Later, I saw Barney, and we had a few beers in the parking lot. I was a little tipsy at that point, so I had trouble finding the theater again. When I walked in, the movie had changed a lot. Some guy called “Indiana Jones” was being chased by the biggest rock I ever saw! It was amazing! This concludes my review of Raiders of the Lost Ark

Next Week: Star Wars


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