Cleaning what with what?

A bold statement and a difficult request was given to the Metro Manila Development Agency (MMDA) by the President last Saturday. “I want you to clean Metro Manila Singapore style”.

http://beta.ph.news.yahoo.com/mmda-clean-city-singapore-style-20110226-023754-673.html

Which just goes to show that the man elected by the people to govern isn’t completely incompetent. This isn’t an insult I’m just saying that his heart is in the right place even though his brain isn’t.

More than the proposal though this plan has less substance than the smoke I exhale, in the context that there isn’t even a plan yet. Knowing what needs to be done and knowing how one goes about doing it are two completely different things and you need to master the second before even thinking about hoping to get to the first.

At this point until a plan is proposed, tested and executed I’m not getting my hopes up for the Metro.

Hold on, I’m not being completely fair. Never mind that implementation of law is the one thing our authorities suck so much at (I dare anyone to contest this). They have a semblance of a plan which is tapping “environmental enforcers” to strictly implement existing laws that criminalize litter bugs.

The term ‘tapping’ is hilarious to me because it sounds like the government is planning to fuck enforcers into implementing laws. Though I should tell them now that won’t work because they’ll just jump off a train platform before the gov’t even gets to them. Maybe that’s why that guy committed suicide earlier today. Damn, they work fast when it comes to that.

http://ph.news.yahoo.com/mb/20110227/tph-man-jumps-to-his-death-from-lrt-020e1c8.html

But back to sanity, tapping is still murky to me. Does it mean that they’ll be hiring people to act as enforcers? If so, what’s the scope of their authority? Can they punish or arrest people? What qualifications are needed to become one? If they’re not hiring do they already have people assigned to that? Where were they all along? Why did they lie dormant until now? Or, will they be taking people already in authority and place their duties specifically on clean-ups? Will they have their own department? Will this mean an increase in taxes to implement?

So many questions on just one word! Isn’t it lovely how effective the English language is to the purposes of ambiguity. Maybe that’s why our Constitution and most of our legal officers and courts use it. So no one knows quite what the fuck anyone is talking about, and even if some people know they can’t be sure, and even if they are sure it could easily twisted and turned into a hundred different meanings and references.

Not to mention that this proposal has revealed a stark reality in our governing officials. That they are blissfully unaware of the gravity and type of problem facing the Metro. Cleanliness in this mega-city isn’t degrading solely on the backs of litter bugs and spitters.

Take a walk at any time of the day and the pavement will be lined with the splattered remains of most-of-the-time-dry feces (and when you venture out at night I cannot guarantee that they belong to dogs).

If that doesn’t bother you solid waste isn’t the only bodily excrement lounging in full display on the streets. Some food for thought; when people have nowhere to live where do you they go to pee or have sex hmm?

It amuses me to no end when people are so disgusted to even talk about such discharges when every time you jay walk you’re ankle-deep in it.

Fact: If tianaks were real they’d take over the banks of the Pasig and most parts of Aurora Boulevard and EDSA.

Having said all this, yeah, if you step on something while on commute pray that it’s just spit.

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